Aircraft Maintnance

[EddieS'04]

Aircraft Maintenance





Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and responses:



P = the problem logged by the pilot.

S = the solution and action taken by engineers.



P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.

S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.



P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.

S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.



P: Something loose in cockpit.

S: Something tightened in cockpit.



P: Dead bugs on windshield.

S: Live bugs on back-order.



P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.

S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.



P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.

S: Evidence removed.



P: DME volume unbelievably loud.

S: DME volume set to more believable level.



P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.

S: That's what they're there for.



P: IFF inoperative.

S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.



P: Suspected crack in windshield.

S: Suspect you're right.



P: Number 3 engine missing.

S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.



P: Aircraft handles funny.

S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and be serious.



P: Target radar hums.

S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.



P: Mouse in cockpit.

S: Cat installed

 

[Richard L]

Eddie,

:bwahaha: :bwahaha:



The only part that is not funny is that those are probably very real Problems/Solutions. :cry:

And if you fly alot, that can be very scary.



...Rich

 

[LaRue Medlin]

This along the same lines;



A performance step in a real Air Force Tech Order.



1) Open lock



Note: If key will not open lock, check for correct key.



2) Open lock



3) Remove lock



THIS WAS A TRUE NOTE IN ONE OF OUR T.O.'s

 

[Richard L]

Hey LaRue,

It looks like you were a Locksmith in the Air Force too....:grin:



...Rich