Living is South Carolina

[LaRue Medlin]

THINGS YOU WILL LEARN FROM LIVING IN SOUTH CAROLINA ...

1. Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.

2. There are 5,000 types of snakes on earth and 4,998 live in South Carolina .

3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in South Carolina plus a couple others no one has ever seen

before.

4. If it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites.

5. Onced and Twiced are words.

6. It is not a shopping cart; it is a buggy.

7. People actually grow and eat okra.

8. 'Fixinto' is one word.

9. There is no s uch thing as 'lunch.' There is only dinner and then there is supper.

10. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with

our sugar!

11. Backards and forwards means 'I know everything about you.'

12. DJeet? is actually a phrase meaning 'Did you eat?'

13. You don't have to wear a watch because it doesn't matter what time it is. You work until you're done or it's

too dark to see.

14. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH them. You also measure distance in minutes.

16. You have to switch from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day.

17. 'Fix' is a verb. Example: 'I'm fixing to go to the store.'

18. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.

19. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.

20. You know what a 'DAWG' is.

21. You carry jumper cables in your car . . for your OWN car.

22. There are only own four spices: salt, pepper, Tabasco and ketchup.

23. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local gossip

and sports.

24. The first day of deer season is a national holiday.

25. 100 degrees Fahrenheit 'a little warm. 'We have four seasons : Almost Humid, Humid, still Humid and

Christmas.

26. Going to Wal-mart is a favorite past time known as 'goin' Wal-martin' or off to 'Wally World.'

27. A cool snap (below 70 degrees) is good pinto-bean weather.

28. A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola or pop . . . it's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor. Example:

'What kinda coke you want?'

29. Fried catfish is the other white meat.

30. We don't need no stinking driver's ed . . if our mama says we can drive, we can drive.

31. If you understand these jokes please share them with your friends from South Carolina (and those who just

wish they were). EVERYONE can't be a South Carolinian; it takes talent.

 

[Gypsy me]

That's pretty funny LaRue! I can post this one:





You know you are from Pennsylvania when:

You have an uncontrollable urge to buy bread and milk when you hear the word "snow."

You say the correct pronunciation LANG-kist-er instead of the mispronounced Lan-CAST-er, and LEB-en-in instead of the equally incorrect Leb-a-NON.

You know the only way to make good fastnachts is to cook them in LARD.

You live within two miles of a plant that makes potato chips, corn chips,pretzels, candy, or ice cream, or that packages turkeys, beans, or bologna.

You can stop along the road to buy fruits, vegetables, or crafts on the "honor system."

You know what REAL pot pie is.

YOUR turkey has "filling," not "stuffing," and most certainly, NOT "dressing."

You know that chicken corn soup from a fire house is the most nearly perfect food on earth.

You say things like, "Outen the lights," "I'm calling off today," and "They're calling for snow."

You've heard of distelfinks and hex signs.

You only buy your beer and soda by the case.

You think the roads in any other state are smooth.

You know the Penn State cheer, and although you've never attended PennState, you are a most obnoxious Penn State fan. (WE ARE...ANNOYING!)

Hearing horses clopping down a paved street doesn't bring you to the window to see what's going on outside.

You never see any Confederate Flags, except on the Gettysburg Battlefield.

You prefer Hershey's Chocolate to Godiva.

You consider Pittsburgh to be "out west," and you know the fastest way to Philly is the Turnpike.

School closings due to snow take the radio stations a half an hour to finish, because just about every town has its own school district.

When someone says 1972, you think "Agnes," and when someone says 1979, you think "TMI."

You call sloppy joes "barbecue."

When it snows, they put cinders on the roads instead of sand.

You can give directions to Intercourse with a straight face.

Know that Yuengling is pronounced "Ying-ling," and believe that it really is a premium beer (which comes from growing up on Schlitz and Iron City).

Have the Rolling Rock bottle memorized: "From the glass lined tanks of Old Latrobe, we tender this premium beer for your enjoyment. . . . "

Know that Wilkes-Barre is pronounced "Wilks Berry."

Can pronounce "Knoebels."

Can pronounce (or spell) "Schuylkill."

Live for summer, when street fairs signal the beginning of funnel cake season.

Have a day off school on the Monday after Thanksgiving, which is the first day of hunting season.

Never have to worry about being stuck in a ditch when it's snowing. -someone in a 4WD pickup with tow chains will be along shortly.

Elect pro-life Democrats and pro-choice Republicans for Governor (i.e., Casey and Ridge)

Frequently go "with," e.g., "You going to the market? Mind if I come with?"

Refer to something as "a whole nother," e.g., "That's a whole nother issue."





And near Pittsburgh when:

The plural of "you" is "youns."

Most sentences end with "an'at" (abbreviated from "and that") -- I'm still not sure of the derivation, but it's the local version of "and stuff" or "and so on."

You HOOVER, you don't vaccuum.

You get sodie-pops.

You only own three spices: salt, pepper, ketchup.

You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

You have more miles on your snowblower than your car.

You have 10 favorite recipes for venison.

Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.

You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie.

You owe more money on your snowmobile than your car.

Your snowblower gets stuck on your roof.

The local paper covers National and International headlines on 1/4 page but requires six pages for sports.

You think the start of deer hunting is a National

 

[Tony Tyler 2]

Two more you forgot LaRue:



31. Dont' take a vacation to the beach on Memorial Day.

32. Christmas and all other holidays are always second to Clemson/Carolina Day!!