Politically correct holiday greeting

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Tim Reynolds

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Don't normally pass these on but just too funny to pass up.

Hope I don't offend anyone with this :lol:



For Our Democratic Friends:



"Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2006, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. And without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee. By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher."





For Our Republican Friends:



Here's wishing all of You a

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year

 
:D Love it! :D



I received the a very similar one in my e-mail a couple days before Christmas--but it was a little different:



The "For Our Democrat Friends" one was identical, word-for-word.



The one that is listed here as being "For Our Republican Friends" was listed in the one I received as "For Our Friends Who Aren't Political".



And lastly, there was a different "For Our Republican Friends": "Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year-Unless you're Jewish or Atheist, then @#$% you!"



:)
 
I'm a Democrat and to me it is Merry Christmas! Lets see we'd have to change all holidays then wouldn't we? I guess they might be like this; :wacko::wacko: Easter would be "Colored Eggs Delivered by a Rabbitt Day", Martin Luther King Day would be "Some Famous Black Guys Birthday", anybody's birthday would be "Another Year Closer To Death Day", July 4th would be "Cookout and Spend All Your Money On Things that Light Up, Shoot Up in the Air or Go Boom Day" Anniversarys would be " Oh Crap What the Heck Have I Done DAy", Thanksgiving would be "Sit On Your Fat Butt and Stuff Your Face and GEt FAtter Day", and New Years Day would be "I Drank Too Much Last Night, Got Drunk and Can't Come To Work Today Day" just to name a few. :lol::lol: These are not meant to offend and are just as a joke!!!!! Please to anyone that influences holidays we like them named just the way they are.

Happy New Year and may ALL of you have a better year nest than you did this year!
 
Right on Darrel,



"Please to anyone that influences holidays we like them named just the way they are."



We don't refer to the Manorah as a candlestick do we? :p



This is not meant to be a serious thread at all. Happy and safe new year to all.



Tim
 
Is it ok to say " bless you" when someone sneeeeeezzzzeeezz? I'm so confused now:blink:
 
B, I think the correct thing to say is Kazontheit (sp?) unless some German is around, then a quiet giggle is more appropriate. :D



BTW does anyone have the correct spelling for that word? This is the first time I've ever tried to write it.
 
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Apparently it's not OK to say "bless you" after a sneeze. Way back when I worked with some folks who completely ignored you when you said that after they sneezed. They were born again or something like that and apparently their religion didn't believe in that "tradition" so I guess they preferred to be rude.



Come to find out I was damned to hell anyway because I wasn't part of their "club" so maybe I need all the blessing I can get.



Oh crap...this wasn't supposed to be a serious thread.
 
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