Todays Funny

[EddieS'04]

After the doctor gives the patient his diagnosis, the patient says, "Can I have a second opinion?"

The doctor says, "Sure. Come back tomorrow."





Yep, its corny...

 

[Jerry Gerner 2]

Wah, Wah Wah !!! :bwahaha:

 

[Mike Dziubina]

Chuck Norris was once diagnosed with cancer, he gave the doctor 6 months to live...

 

[Kevin Lang]

Nice. Reminds me of the old Hee-Haw lines.



Patient: "Doctor, am I sick?"



Doctor:"I'm afraid you're very sick"



Patient:"I want a second opinion!"



Doctor:"Okay, you're ugly too!"



Right up there with:

Patient: "Doctor, Doctor, it hurts when I do this!"

Doctor: "Then don't do that!"

&

Patient:"Doctor, I broke my leg in 3 places!"

Doctor:"Then stay out of those places!" :bwahaha:



"Why sir, you're drunk!" "Madam, I may be drunk, but you're ugly. In the morning, I'll be sober, and you'll still be ugly!"--legendary exchange between Prime Minister Winston Churchill & a woman.

 

[Mike Dziubina]

I do not recall that Churchill quote KL but there was one that went



Nancy Astor: Sir, if you were my husband, I would give you poison.

Churchill: If I were your husband I would take it.

 

[DaninVa]

I thought the "drunk/ugly" line was from W. C. Fields.....

 

[EddieS'04]

WC Fields..said it...

 

[Kevin Lang]

Are you guys sure that Churchill did not say this? The internet is rife with attributions to him for this quote, and I think I even have a pre-Internet era encyclopedia with that quote in it, attributed to him.



I've found several variations of Mike - CT's quote attributed to Churchill on those same pages. Generally right next to my now-spurious quote of the conversation between Churchill & Braddock.



I haven't seen anything attributing that line to WC Fields. Maybe he just borrowed it? I can see the why you'd think it was his, as a great many of his quotes are about booze or women. The primordial Charlie Sheen.

 

[EddieS'04]

Kevin, I think I saw the movie that wc said this in. It was a long time ago though. Dont know if it was borowed.

What I remember was simular but different.

 

[Kevin Lang]

I'm pretty sure that I've never seen a WC Fields movie, so I'll take your word for it.